Worthy of love

I reckon I have spent more time than most people on making myself worthy of love.

On its face, this sounds absurd and dystopic. We are taught, ideally, from a young age, that love is meant to be given freely, unconditionally.

That is of course impossible. No one can give love forever without something being reciprocated.

Eternity is, for the most part, a polite fiction. A lie we believe in to stay sane.

What is love in the first place? Love is anything but rational. It is a feeling of deep admiration and care for the object of affection. It is a desire to see it reach its full potential, to attain happiness, and attain its own agency.

Love casts everything you do in a good light. Every action is a delight, every statement full of insight, and any misstep is easily forgotten.

So then what is the currency you use to buy love?

I've done some thinking about it. I think what makes you loved is beauty.

People are drawn to love that which is beautiful.

In contemporary Western culture, and especially for women, this can be very literal.